I didn’t wake up any whiter. I didn’t expect to but I still checked.
In a school full of white kids, there was me (indian) and one other girl who was also Indian. The difference was she knew English and was somewhat western. I was fob, and I had no friends. Zero.
I was teased, a lot, for no reason, by a range of peers. One or two instigators, a lot of jumping on the band waganers, and the rest ignored it and me.
I knew I was stronger, faster, bigger. But I simply didn’t have the anger. I took it. Not understanding why it was happening. Agreeing with them that I was black.. stinky.. and so many other things.
I remember a specific moment in grade 7, two captains were chosen and then they took turns to pick a player. I have forgotten the teachers name, but that day he erupted in frustration after few people had already been picked, saying “what the heck is wrong with you guys, don’t you want to win! You know if you pick Gee, you will win!”. I was standing at the back, already knowing I wouldn’t be picked until last. The captain’s continued to pick other people, I glanced at the teacher who threw his hands up in the air in defeat.
I said to myself, I’m going to prove what he just said right. The game was a hybrid of base ball and cricket. I was last to bat, another thing I was used to. The other team had made 143 runs and so far our team had made 35. I made the rest to get a win.
The teacher was so happy, cheering me on and then, patting me on the back at the end.
I never did home work which caused me to be in trouble every day. This treatment happened all the way to the last day of year 7.. Somehow, it didn’t matter back then like it does now that I think back. I feel pain for that kid but at the time, the kid didn’t really feel or understand.. a blessing in disguise.